Being able to stand up for yourself and negotiate clearly and calmly with others is a very important life skill to have. It can be helpful in your relationships both professionally and personally. Good negotiation skills take time to develop, they don’t just happen overnight. But there are a variety of ways to work on them, so you can reach happy and healthy compromises. Let’s dive in.
What is negotiation?
Negotiation starts with a conversation. One or both individuals express their wants, needs, or frustrations, and through open communication, they exchange ideas about what they’re seeking and whether the other person is willing to reach an agreement. A negotiation is successful when both parties arrive at a mutually beneficial compromise.
What negotiation skills do I need?
To be a strategic and smart negotiator, there are a couple of key traits to focus on.
First, you need to communicate clearly, calmly, and rationally. Negotiation can only happen when both parties are listening and everything has been understood without confusion. Next, you must plan a strategy of what you’re going to say, how it’s going to impact the other person long-term, and a backup plan if the first one doesn’t work. Plan effectively so you know what you’ll argue before going into it and how you may counter any disagreements from the other party.
And finally, the one who initiated the negotiation, must be persuasive and have a reason for where they’re headed in the conversation and why. When a negotiator can work strategically with the other individual and influence them to accept the desired solution, that’s when they know they’ve come to a finished negotiation.
Who negotiates the most in the workplace?
Negotiations can happen all over the workplace. You could find yourself negotiating with a wide variety of individuals or groups, such as managers, colleagues, vendors, and the public.
With managers, employees often need to have the skills to negotiate around topics such as pay, promotions, holidays, notice periods, and hours at work. It may be scary to speak to your manager at first, but you must communicate clearly, so they understand what’s going on and what’s needed, so you are satisfied with your job.
When working in teams with coworkers, you’ll come across time you’ll need to negotiate with them. Whether it’s through delegating a project, dividing up tasks, splitting time off, healthy negotiations will help you discuss your preferences and get your message across clearly to your colleagues.
Businesses that export products need to work with vendors, while those offering services must connect with service providers. These external partners may not always offer ideal prices, turnaround times, or communication. That’s why strong negotiation skills are essential—they help create smooth collaboration instead of ongoing frustration.
The final type of negotiation you might encounter is a public negotiation. For example, if you work in retail—say, at an op shop—and a customer brings an item to the counter with no price tag, negotiation may occur between the staff and customer to agree on a fair price. Public negotiations also happen on ticket resale websites or social media marketplaces, where items are listed at varying prices. In these situations, both buyers and sellers negotiate to reach a price they’re both satisfied with.
Types of negotiation
When negotiating, there are two ways it can be done:
Distributive negotiations
This type of negotiation is where only one individual can get what they want. It’s considered a ‘win-lose’ negotiation, because terms could only truly satisfy one side of the negotiation. For example, in a vendor scenario, a business owner may want a delivery at 5 pm, while the vendor prefers 11 am. In a typical, integrative negotiation, both might compromise on a time, such as 3 pm, that works for both. But in a distributive negotiation, the business owner insists on 5 pm, and the vendor must concede, resulting in a win for one and a loss for the other.
Integrative negotiations
Now in contrast, an integrative negotiation is a ‘win-win’ where both parties feel satisfied with the outcome. Let’s say you’re negotiating your pay with your manager. You ask for one salary wage, your manager offers another but together, you agree on a price in the middle, demonstrating a small win for the both of you.
By understanding these two ways of negotiating, you can go into situations more prepared and confident with what you’re getting out of it.
How to improve negotiation skills
Already working in a business and wondering how to improve your negotiation skills? While you may have experience negotiating with family, friends, or partners, navigating it in a professional setting can feel a bit different. Don’t worry—we’ve got you covered. Here’s how to approach it the right way:
- Professionalism can take you a long way and confidence is key. When entering a negotiation, speak with a rational tone, show respect, yet demonstrate assertiveness. You must consider the other person’s perspective, but also take time to actively listen to their points. No one wants to negotiate in an environment filled with stress, high emotions, or raised voices. So instead, someone who enters with a calm, cool and collected energy, an aura of confidence will come off and show others exactly what business you came to conduct.
- Know when you’re willing to compromise. If you’re negotiating around pay, hours, or holidays, be clear with what you prefer, but also be aware of where you can meet in the middle if your manager offers something else. This is known as BATNA, the ‘best alternative to a negotiated agreement.’ While you may negotiate for one thing, and the other person may alter it, if you can meet somewhere in the middle, you’re meeting your BATNA. Remember your value, as you don’t want someone to walk all over you, but also understand that sometimes, compromise is a better option than nothing at all.
- Negotiation goes two ways. Being a good listener allows you to understand the other person’s needs, view the situation from a different perspective, as well as give others the chance. When you’re empathetic and open, you can strengthen your listening skills and respond to conflict more effectively, leading to better solutions. It’s not recommended to already have your answers built up in your head first, because you won’t be actively listening and responding, you’ll just be sharing your biased perspective.
- Be okay with hearing “no.” Sometimes, even after negotiating your heart out, things just won’t work out. You might hit a wall and realise every option, workaround, or loophole has been exhausted. Don’t drive yourself crazy—recognise it’s a no, and focus on what your next step can be from there.
- Consider your failures and learn from them. Not every negotiation will go smoothly—misread emails, unclear texts, or non-verbal cues can all lead to misunderstandings. That’s why it’s best to negotiate in person whenever possible and communicate clearly. If things don’t go as planned, recognise that your approach might need adjusting. There’s no need to beat yourself up—just take it as a chance to grow.
Negotiation skills can be your superpowers
With strong communication and negotiation skills, you can conquer anything. Knowing that negotiation will always be in our lives, both professionally and personally, strengthening these skills can help you prioritise what’s important to you. So take your next leap and negotiate with entrepreneurs, innovators, and business founders just like you.
At Haven Workspaces, we value communities that bring people together and help shape a brighter future. As a premium business hub and coworking space in Canberra, our goal is to create an environment where both businesses and relationships can thrive.
